Episode 38 – Holly

In this week’s episode:

I talk a little bit about my decision to look for another job.

In news and reviews, I examine an article from the Washington Post about algorithms designed to – without our knowledge – assess our mental health.  Please, let me know what you think about this issue at becky@thatbword.com


My guest this week is Holly.  We discuss a range of topics including the concept of a “favorite person” in the context of BPD.

Thanks, Guys!  See you next week!

Episode 37 – Discussing Dissociation with Kathy

In this week’s episode:

I’m sorry I’ve been away so long! But I promise this episode will be worth the wait.

It turns out that team sports and cycling are the best exercises for your mental health:


Yet another “psychedelics will save the world” article:


Bipolar disorder in older adults:


The Interview this week is with Kathy from Discussing Dissociation (discussingdissociation.com).  

She is a DID specialist with tons of insight into the disorder, and our conversation was very enlightening.

Thanks for listening, See you next week (promise)!


Episode 36 – Samantha’s Story

Samantha's Story

In this week’s episode:

It’s an interview – only episode, but what an interview! I talk to Samantha about that often left-out B Word – bisexuality – and eating disorders.

Thanks for downloading!

Down Time

I just spent two hours alternately staring blankly at my computer screen and checking my phone. I walked around the office once, twice, three times.  I asked all of my co-workers if they had anything they needed help with.

I guess you could say I have some down time.

There’s something about trying to look busy when you are not that really hurts my mood.  It’s not just starting at a computer screen blankly, clicking random buttons in an attempt to look busy.  It’s about what my brain is doing while it is not otherwise occupied with work related tasks – and what it does it think, think, think.  Case in point: I’m going to Washington DC soon to record for another podcast (the Grey Council – check it out) during a neo-nazi rally.  Will it be safe?  Do we really have the money to do something like that?  Obviously not, there are so many other things to do to fix up the house, fix my care – oh, my car.  I need a new tire and an oil change stat, but I couldn’t pull it off this week because we had some major plumbing problems that needed fixed immediately. That on top of the car payment which I KNOW I shouldn’t have agreed to such a high payment.  What was I thinking?

On and on, my brain goes. Finances. (going to end up living in a box).  Health (that spot on the back of my hand – is it melanoma?). Responsibilities (there’s so much to do at home and I’m stuck here). It’s on days like this that my mood will inevitably start to flag. It’s only a matter of time before I start thinking of things that I don’t want to be thinking about – the really scary, disturbing things – start to take over. Perhaps that’s what was meant by the “low tolerance for boredom” article I found when I googled bipolar and boredom.

Honestly, I don’t really even know if that’s the fault of my Bipolar Disorder (well, the too-expensive car probably is) or if everyone’s mood is affected by severe boredom.  I figure that almost everyone is.  The difference, as with everything, is a matter of degree.  Could it put me into a tailspin?  The past few days have been very stable, and I hardly want to break that streak.  Then again, I am allowed to have feelings, right?  Not every thougth that passes through my head is a symptomatic thought.

Three hours, now.

I suppose this blog is a way of keeping my thoughts from entering that dreaded spiral.  It forces me into coherent thought.  Well, I’d like to think that it is coherent thought, anyway.

Why is it that boredom can make you turn on a dime?  I think part of it has to be the unrestrained/untamed mind set loose, while the body is assigned to a seat in which it must sit.  If the body, like the mind, was allowed freedom of place and of movement, then a balance could be achieved.  Boredom is, essentially, imbalance. It forces the mind to turn on itself for distraction, and ultimately the mind is going to fall back into those patterns which have already been well entrenched.  Unfortunately for me, those patterns have more to do with trauma than anything else.

I think part of it is also the useless feeling that comes up when I can’t be completing a task or accomplishing something, even if it’s just the hum drum workaday stuff that I do every day.

32 minutes until lunch.  I don’t know if I can take this much longer.  How do I have NOTHING to do?  How is it possible?

Episode 35 – Jason Miller

Hi guys, I’m excited to tell you about That B Word’s first sponsor, My Dialectical Life. Every day, you will recieve a new email focusing on one
aspect of Dialectical Behavior Therapy, or DBT. I’ve been recieving these emails and they give you something to practice every day. If you’re interested in DBT it’s definitely worth a look. Go to http://www.hopeforbpd.com/my-dialectical-life-dbt-selfhelp/ for more information or to sign up.

In this week’s episode:

Plumbing issues?  Ugh.  But let’s not dwell.

It’s Minority Mental Health month, so I’ve chosen and article written for minorities.  I hope this white girl did ok with it.


My guest this week is former  guest blogger Jason Miller.

I highly suggest reading his blog before listening!

You can find Jason on the interwebs at www.bipolarisbeautiful.com
or at inspirational and emotional courage on Facebook.

Thank you for listening!


@thatbword1 on twitter


Episode 34 – Aubrey Good

In this week’s episode:

Guess what?  I’m still sick.  Luckily I recorded a great interview with Aubrey before this foul disease laid me low.

We have our first ever sponsor!  Not only that, but it’s topical.  Go to http://www.hopeforbpd.com/my-dialectical-life-dbt-selfhelp to sign up for a daily email with a dbt skill to practice.  I’ve been getting these emails for a few days and they have some really good insights.  If you check it out, be sure to let me know what you think!

My interview this week is with Aubrey from the International Bipolar Foundation.  I hope you enjoy!

As always, email me at becky@thatbword.com or find me on twitter @thatbword1




Episode 33 – Dennie Maverick

In this week’s episode –

I’m super sick.  As a consequence, you don’t have the pleasure of my dulcet tones in your head.  Apart from a brief mention of New York and Virginia making mental health education mandatory, it’s straight on to the interview.

The interview this week is with Dennie Maverick, who is writing the memoir “Crazy and Proud of It”.  You can find her on twitter at @author_bipolar

Thanks for listening, guys!

See you next week.


Episode 32 – Heather from On The Aspie Side, Part 3

In this week’s episode:

Bryan is back to help me with this week’s news!

My interview this week is the conclusion of the Heather of On the Aspie Side series.

Sorry it’s a little late this week, time got the better of me!

See you next week!

Episode 31 – ECT with Becky from Chicago

In this week’s episode:

It’s been a sucktastic weekend for me, but I’m still stable.  I guess that says something good about the Vraylar!

In the news, the WHO has classified Gaming Disorder as a mental illness.

Video Game Addiction Is Now Officially Classified As A Mental Illness


My interview today is with Becky from Chicago.  We discuss her experiences with ECT, medication, and the stigma surrounding both.

mentioned in the episode:


Email me at becky@thatbword.com\

and please rate, review, and subscribe!


Problems with iTunes?

Hey all,

I just figured out that Episode 30 (and other podcasts) can’t be updated on iTunes unless you download the iTunes update which includes the GDPR language.

Please update iTunes so you can continue to listen!